Larry Smith Lingo & Prof Quotes
Back by popular demand. Larry Smith lingo:
- I'm sorry, ladies and gentlemen; we're finishing this course come hell or heart attack
- Mr. Disney is getting deader and deader.
- Big books are hard to steal.
- You'd have to be quite desperate to go to Guelph.
- If you engineers didn't spend so much time at the Bomber, the (overhead) screen would just know I wanted it to go down.
- You mathies might protest against the purity of this, but the constant K is not really a constant, it varies a bit.
- You can go to the Bank of Canada website and look up these numbers [about forms of money]. It's more fun than visiting a porno site.
- Steal our gold? Gag on it you will! ... sounds a bit like Yoda.
- Don't worry. I'm going to criticize other professions too. I'm an equal-opportunity criticizer.
- People who have REAL lives get hundreds of email messages a day. How do I know you're a real person? When I ask you how it's going and you say: Damn email's driving me crazy! Yes! You've reached manhood!
- The fashion industry is driven by diminishing utility. Don't look at me, you dopey males, like 'only the women do that.'
- This evening the universe and my course are in perfect sync!
- [Reffering to Bill Gate's marketing strategies] "Want a PC? I come with it! Buahahahaha"
- If you use your professional credentials, I will use Einstein on you!
- Maybe I should fall down and break my neck. That would be entertaining.
- [On where to find him next term] "DC 1351. I don't have a life any more.
- [On why he is so tired he can't even speak coherent sentences] "Whatever. Put the words in the right order".
- Masturbation is merely the act of making love to the one you love best.
- That's why I like tormenting the young.
- I'm a legend in my own mind.
- [KFC USA vs KFC CA] "They still fry the damn chicken to death."
- Then I get to eat with my hands — as God intended.
- One day I will stack up a pile of Chicken McNuggets and light them on fire — in the store — I swear to God.
- [looks under student's desk] "Sorry, I just had to check things out.
- They see the smell of profit.
- Rock the boat! Don't tweak!
- Radical means you're at war with society.
- In a tornado, even turkeys can fly.
- You know that somewhere, someone is trying to touch
you soul -- or sell you something (Larry on the
crackberry)
- Beware, beware, danger there lurks. Warning, warning,
run in the other direction...
- Now what does the herd conclude? Doubling is good.
(analysis of herd mentality, aka the stock market)
- I have something humanity wants!
- You engineers you!
- Save me from hypocrisy, it makes me twitch more than stupidity does.
- That is an argument of limited coherence.
- Quite rightly, you should look bamboozled.
- Squashing the brains of the little pup-PIES!
- Deduce rather brilliantly that ...
- English is under siege!
- Knowing about this defines you as a part of the elite.
- Talking with your friends at the bomber.
- There is no romance in your souls.
- I will take it all and I will love it!
- My spies are everywhere ...
- When you talk about me with your friends at the bomber ...
- I am your Trusty Instructor
- Oh my heart be still!
- You Canadians you . . . you half-frozen people!
- Spooky Spooky Spooky!
- Americans know of only two countries America and Not-America.
- Warning Warning, Danger Danger!
- Don't look at me as if I'm a Zen Buddhist philosopher!
- Why are gas prices rising? Because nast people in Alberta hate you!
- Stupid roommate, come!
- A person who can see in the land of the blind will be king
- If you don't wanna play with the adults stay home
- Average people scamper
- MBA's are drivern about what the #'s say. Without the #'s they're bambi.
- Consumers don't know what they want
- Consumers are dippy
- (In regards to Jurassic Park 2), ...would have like to have seen the kids
being eaten
- You've arrived when you've got tax problems
- If you're not innovative, you won't be making a lot of money
- As our hero Lord Keynes would say, ...
- Some of you out there may possess collector's editions of my old notes ...
- This concludes the weekly briefing. (Not funny, just nostalgic.)
- I ask you, Gentle People, would your trusty instructor lie to you?
- You know your investment strategy is coming unglued when you're buying those 'collector plates'.
- (about first-time cottagers opening the doors on the spring for the first time) They say 'Oh my God, it looks like a dead squirrel--what do I do?' Well, either throw it out or barbeque it, but do SOMETHING!
- I do NOT care if I can buy underwear on the Internet!
- I wonder where she [Buffy the Vampire Slayer] was in my highschool. . .all
my teenage fantasies rolled together.
- I'm suffering from a lack of oxygen here [due to a cold]. PRETEND I look agitated!
- Trudeau created the Anti-Inflation Board. And what kind of teeth did he give it? BIG, SHINY ones!
- There are some goofy rites of passage in Canada. People are 'rolling up the rim', so it must be spring!
- I'm on so much [cold] medication that I've lost all ability to censor myself!
- I don't need to impress you, I impress myself
- stupid dumb globe and sickly stunted mail
- Anonymity is your friend. Hmmm.. If someone adds an item to this list without knowing who "Larry" is... Is this still a list of Larryisms?
- For the moment, ride the tiger.
Submissions from: Lorne, John, Megan, Mike, Rhonda and Matt from Shad Valley, ECON 101, ECON 102, and ECON 220 at The University of Waterloo.
Quotes also stolen from 'Mathnews.
Have one to add? Email me: mgoyer@fairtunes.com
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